This past week has been possibly the longest week of my life. It's been filled with so many emotions and so many ups and downs. Jon and I have never felt so helpless, yet we've never felt so blessed.
We welcomed our sweet Scarlett June early Saturday morning, July 14th at 6:14am. Her arrival was so anticipated, but also came with some surprises we weren't quite prepared for to hear.
Over the next few posts, I wanted to take a day by day look into our lives as we've welcomed our sweet baby girl into this world.
The night before Scarlett was born, was just like every other night. We decided we'd eat out at Applebee's for date night and use the free kids meal Hunter had gotten from kindergarten months ago.
As we were headed out the door, it started to rain, so with Jaina and Grey holding my hands, I waddled towards the van as fast as I could. We headed home and got the kids into bed and then Jon and I settled into ours. Being particularly nervous about having a c-section, I asked Jon if we could watch one on Youtube so I had some idea what I was up for. (Scarlett was breech, so I knew unless she turned, I would have to have a c-section). It was pretty had to watch and I started to cry. I really didn't want to have to go through that- although delivering natural didn't sound too exciting either.
We fell asleep and as I was peacefully dreaming away, I was woken up around 1am by my water breaking. I was still in that phase between being asleep and being awake so everything was moving in slow motion. I woke Jon up and he helped get the kids awake and into the van, while I packed my bag that I had been meaning to pack for days. At this time I was 3 weeks and a few days early. Jon gave me a blessing and we got in the van.
We headed to my wonderful sister's house. Hunter and Jaina were wide awake. They were so excited that soon they would be able to see their new baby sister. As I walked out my sisters door, I knew my kids were in good hands and that soon we would have a new addition to our family.
We arrived at the hospital around 2am, got checked in through the ER, and a nice nurse wheeled me up to Labor and Delivery. I did all the routine things and they started an IV after 7 attempts. Scarlett was still breech, so I prepared myself mentally to have a c-section. The nurse asked what we were going to name the baby and we said we weren't sure yet, but maybe Scarlett- (we had a couple other names chosen at that point, but all the doctors and nurses started calling her Scarlett even before she was born, so it just seemed right that that was her name.)
Around 5:45am, Drs. Meek and Bitner arrived and they wheeled me into the surgical room. Jon had to stay behind while they started the epidural. I was so afraid.
Then I thought of the scripture in Proverbs 3:5,6
At 6:14am, Scarlett was born. I couldn't see her because of a sheet they put between me and my stomach, but I knew they had pulled her out. She wasn't crying. That worried me a little, but I though it just might take a few seconds.They took her out of the room with Jon and still I could not hear any crying. I really started to worry. After a few minutes, I asked the nurse if my baby was okay. She paused a second and said she had difficulty breathing so they took her to the NICU. My mind was racing, I'm sure I said a few prayers during those long minutes. She just had to be okay. My whole pregnancy the doctor said everything looked perfectly fine, she just had to start breathing.
Jon said when he had stepped out of the room with Scarlett and the nurses, they tried putting oxygen in her lungs, but Scarlett was not responding. After a few minutes and an Apgar score of 5, they told Jon they had to run her up to NICU. He said that is literally what they did. They scooped her up and ran out the door.
Jon and I waited a couple hours until we had word on how our sweet baby girl was doing. Those were looong hours. I became anxious every time I'd see someone pass our room.
Finally the doctor caring for Scarlett walked in and told us the news. Scarlett could not breath on her own, they had to put a breathing tube in for her. They had to start an IV through her belly button, her hands and feet muscles were extremely tight and caused them to look stiff and she had a broken femur on her left leg. Then there came the shock. He said he was concerned she may have some type of syndrome and that they sent a chromosome test out. My mind went completely numb. "a syndrome?" How could this be. We were planning on delivering a perfectly healthy baby, and now you are telling me she may have a syndrome? After the doctor left, I cried as Jon held me.
At 9:30am the NICU said we could come see Scarlett. I was so excited to see my baby, but afraid at the same time. Will I think she looks different? am I going to be afraid to touch her? am I going to love her? were all thoughts going through my mind as they wheeled me back.
I remember looking at her... and instantly falling in love. The first thing I noticed was her thick dark hair. And aside from all the tubes and such, I fell in love with her sweet dainty face.
She did not look different to me, I wasn't afraid to touch her fragile little body, and I knew that Heavenly Father sent her to our family because he knew we would love her to pieces.
Scarlett was born with a few obstacles she will have to overcome. My heart aches to know she has a broken leg, but it is wrapped in a splint now and hopefully doesn't cause her pain. They think it broke as they were pulling her out of me during the c-section.
Her hand and feet are so stiff and hard to move, but with a little bit of physical therapy, we hope they will loosen up over time.
Around 6:30pm the night she was born, Scarlett's nurse excitedly came to my room and showed me a picture of Scarlett. Her breathing tube was removed! Jon snapped this photo of me as I drifted off to sleep.
Is is most likely that Scarlett has some form of muscular disorder, although it will be weeks before we find out for sure.
We love our little girl and I feel so incredibly blessed to be her mommy. I count down the minutes I can go see her again in the NICU. Welcome to our family sweet Scarlett!
